Most of us have experienced feeling lost at some point in our lives.
It’s that aching moment when you feel like you have no idea what you are doing, how you got to your current situation, or perhaps where you are heading.
It’s wondering if you are on the right track, and what the future could possibly even look like.
I’ve been there.
There have been a number of periods in my life I would say I felt very lost.
Like when I flunked out of Law School for the second time in my early 20’s after not even attending my exams. Or when I was heartbroken and the image I had painted for my future was no longer an option. Or when I burned myself out from doing what I thought a mother must be considered successful; becoming a martyr and giving of yourself 24/7.
Feeling lost hurts. It’s an uncomfortable ache in your belly that won’t leave you alone. But it isn’t the end of the story.
Here are 3 reasons why feeling lost is a very good thing:
1. Feeling lost is an emotional indicator that something was, or is, out of alignment
We often experience feeling lost when we are out of alignment with what is really true for us. Feeling lost requires that we change in some way, and most of us like to avoid change. If you’re spiritual you could view it as the Universe (or God) giving you a nudge to get back on track.
Feeling lost forces us to open our eyes and see where we are out of whack with our true needs and desires. It forces us to make the changes we need.
In hindsight, I can now see I was sabotaging myself when it came to Law School. I never attended lectures because truth
It wasn’t until Law School was no longer an option that I was forced to really evaluate where I was going career-wise and what I wanted. On the surface level, I was distraught; but at a soul-level, I was absolutely rejoicing. Being a Lawyer would have crushed my spirit and not made the most of my talents. Without flunking out I never would have seen Psychology as a potential career option.
2. Feeling lost will force you to grow
Feeling lost forces you to look at the situation and find the lessons. As human’s we want to find meaning and make sense of things, and so feeling lost pushes you towards a deeper existence. It is often from this feeling that we step into the greatest periods of our personal growth. When everything in life is fine, we don’t tend to look for better.
Feeling lost forces us to look for more. It forces us to raise our expectations of ourselves and what is possible.
Each of the relationships I was in that didn’t last, helped me to attract the right man into my life. I look back with gratitude as I realize what my heartbreak has taught me about myself, my needs, and what I was willing to tolerate in a relationship. Without my previous relationships ending, I wouldn’t have been forced to grow, and I would have likely settled for sub-par.
3. Being lost is one of the things that will allow you to truly find yourself
Self-reflection is one of the keys to living a whole, meaningful and fulfilling life. Yet very few of us are taught how to do this. We don’t naturally stop and check-in to see if we are living a life that is in line with our wants, needs, and desires. We are usually driven towards self-exploration and understanding through some level of psychological discomfort.
Feeling lost is one of the few things that will drive us towards truly seeking out what it is that we need to feel fulfilled. It forces us to find the things that will bring us genuine happiness.
I had a moment where I literally felt I was “brought to my knees.” I was burned out from being a martyr of a mother. I hadn’t been giving anything back to myself. I looked in the mirror and felt like I didn’t even know the woman that was standing in front of me. I was exhausted and disconnected. My heart was calling for a way to express my creativity and use my skills in the world, and I was instead denying and ignoring all of my needs. It was this moment that started me on the journey towards waking up to my deep desires, and starting a blog and then this business. It was through feeling lost that I was able to find the motivation to piece together a fulfilling and balanced life.
Although feeling lost can be incredibly scary and overwhelming, trust that it means you are one step closer to finding what you truly need. It is a crucial step on the path to true and deep fulfillment. Use the energy that comes from the ache of feeling lost to search within yourself and grow.
If you are feeling lost, there is a reason.
As the great Steve Jobs said:
“You cannot connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards . So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
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Hi. I’m Kate Snowise. I’m a Life Coach and host of the Here to Thrive Podcast. I help people get clear on what they want, need and crave, and then helps them take the steps to move towards that.
I believe life is about more than surviving and being good enough. Each of us truly has the ability to thrive and live a beautiful, aligned life where we remember and connect with our authentic selves. I have an MSc in Psychology (the positive kind that concentrates on what is right with you). To read more about my signature coaching program The Thriving Life Project
